Autobiographacrazy? Part 1

Where have we been?

We did not give up on the blog.

We were mountain climbing.

Poor Charlie, always losing organs.

No not candy mountain.

Paperwork…mountain.

After the fundraising was done, we could finally turn our focus toward what was required for us before our first meeting with our Cradle social worker, which is scheduled for this Thursday.

YAYYYYY FORWARD MOTION!!!!

The following was part of the packet of information we had to produce:
- Completed Cradle application
- Balance sheet of our annual home budget
- Family tree(s) with details about those family members
- Completed longish/shortish answer questionnaire about “cultural awareness"
- Sign away some rights of privacy and consent to criminal background checks
- An autobiography for each of us

So, most of those things were not too tough - we already had a budget which we just transposed to The Cradle’s form. We had to be able to demonstrate that we could not only afford the adoption process, but, also a baby after that. Which, because of your help, we are able to say we can!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!

But the real major task was the autobiographies. We were supplied with a page of questions and we were instructed to make sure we addressed each question thoroughly in our autobiographies. Victor ended up with 7 pages. I ended up with 5. Take that as you will.

The questions were rather errr...probing (See: What's a Homestudy?"). For instance, we were asked to "Describe your relationship with your mother using at least 3 adjectives,” “Tell us about a time you struggled,” and “Describe how you were punished growing up.”

The purpose of this autobiography is for our Cradle social worker to get to know Victor and I better.

So - just follow me for a moment - my husband is a State Trooper and I have learned second-hand that when law enforcement pulls over a driver they suspect as a DUI, and the driver tells the officer “I only had X number drinks,” the officer mentally multiplies X number of drinks by 2-3 times to arrive at the truth.

And so, back to this whole autobiography thing - the whole time I was writing it I was thinking about how, of course, I should be very honest in this autobiography. We all have our many, many flaws. But also, people tend to talk about themselves better than they are in reality so... if I am really, truly honest - will our social worker multiply the bad by 2... or 3? 

For instance, when I wrote:

"My mom and I have a fantastic relationship now, but growing up we had a big issue: we were too much alike. We were/are both a bit bossy and  short tempered which meant that we often had tiffs... My mom still has the exchange of letters that witness one particular flair up that inspired her to write up a numbered list of services with which she regularly helped me (driving me to sports practices, feeding me, etc), and for which she would henceforth from the date of that letter be charging me money for because of my lack of appreciation. I responded in writing with a point by point counterargument to her letter. Neither of us remember what came of it all in the end, but we now read through those letters with great hilarity."

Will our social worker think, “She was just a typical teenager.” or will she think, “She needs anger management…” and

Or when I wrote:

"In my younger years I really did not like school. In 1st grade I would go to the nurse's office every day because I “felt sick.” After being told that I could not visit the nurse's office every day, I started going there only every other day. Although the frequency of my visits to the nurse lessened over time, my dislike of school did not. My grades tended to play more to the latter part of the alphabet and I was suspended twice - once in 5th grade and the other time in 7th grade."

Oh shoot… too honest? Did I just voluntarily incriminate myself? Does my honesty make the social worker think that I am being honest, or is she thinking, "If this is what she admits to, can you imagine what the truth is!?! 2-3x worse at least!"

Wait! Wait!

"From my sophomore year of high school onward I had a near perfect GPA and had begun enjoying school and by the time I graduated I had a 3.8 GPA, was part of the National Honor Society, was captain of the gymnastics team, and had received several awards for vocal and track & field achievements … I went on to get my Bachelor's degree at the Ivy League tier University of Chicago where I graduated with honors as well as vocal, track & field, and leadership awards. I currently hold the record in women's pole vault at the University and am in the top 10 for the 400m hurdles."

Perhaps I just redeemed myself. ... Or will she think I am overcompensating for the paragraphs above?

Well, at least when she reads my sweet, amazing, husband’s autobiography that begins with,:

"Before I begin the story of my life, I must begin with a brief history of my parents.  I would not be the person I am today without their sacrifices and strength to do what is right."

she will know that my husband is possibly crazy for being with me.

Excerpts from Victor's autobiography to come...