Home Study: The Interviews

Over the course of the past few weeks, Victor and I have been interviewed together and individually by our social worker Wendy. The first session was with us together and the second and third were individual interviews.

You may recall that I was acting a little insane, thinking about how she might interpret the autobiographies we had to write, and thinking that she might over-analyze mine. One of the key takeaways from the actual interviews (as opposed to the scenarios that played through my head beforehand) was this:

Not a State Trooper

Wendy is just so sweet and understanding and had some really interesting insights about Victor and I.

One of the things I learned is that my husband loves me. And that I am a dingbat. Well, maybe I already knew those things: When we were asked what first made us fall in love with one another I thwarted female stereotypes by not being able to explain myself (perhaps because it is just so obvious, who wouldn't love the guy?) meanwhile, Victor talked about how when he first met me he found someone genuinely unassuming and innocent and for the first time he was able to open up and talk about tough stuff like his time in Iraq.

So serious. "Look like the face on the book!"
2008

Those who know him now might be surprised to know that Victor used to hardly share anything about anything with anybody. What can I say? I broke him. And now when we are in a social setting and he starts oversharing I have no one to blame but myself. I love you, husband.

And of course, when we first met and we were getting to know one another in the library at the University of Chicago, we also connected on a spiritual level. Both of us had Jesus Christ as our Savior, though we came to Him in very different yet similar ways and we found that this grounding was the seat of our deepest connection.

That, and finding an inside joke about fluffy cops and laser-eyed chinchillas hilllllllarious.

    

I think you just...had to be there to fully understand. We don't even really understand it anymore.

It is funny reflecting on those days when we first became best friends. Victor and I were really and truly great friends for while before we ever considered one another romantically, and when that idea surfaced it rose simultaneously with the knowledge that we would be getting married. We more or less went straight from being just friends to being engaged - Which is part of why it was tough to explain what made me fall for him in the first place - because I was the very last person to find out we were meant to be. When did I fall for him? The only times I can recall specifically are literal examples that prove nothing other than that I am a klutz.

Just Friends to Just Married...
and just knocked over their wedding cake.
2010

The main point of these interviews was for Wendy to better understand how our relationship works: how we support one another, how we communicate, and how we disagree. 

In our separate interviews, she asked us what values are most important to us that we want to impart on our child. Despite not having purposely discussed it beforehand, apparently we listed the exact same three items: our spirituality, respect for all people, and the importance of serving our community and neighbors.

So, not that we should have been worried but, as far as the interviews went: I think we passed.

Thank you for joining us on this journey!